"What not to do at a restaurant" #9 Dont Camp!

Respect the section! Let me start by first explaining what a section is. A section is a group of tables. There are several tables in a restaurant. They are divided into sections. Usually, there are several tables in a section, depending on the size of the dining room. There can be anywhere from 5-9 tables per section. That also depends on how many servers are on the floor. The floor being the dining room floor. Not just randomly laying on the floor, that would be silly! You can do the math, but most restaurants have 40-60 tables in the dining room. Of course for a cafe or bistro this is not the case.
So let's play out a scenario somewhere in the middle. In this particular restaurant there are 50 tables and 8 servers on the floor. That means that server has a 6 table section. If filled to capacity that is on a average with 24-36 folks. Hungry and thirsty folks. That is 30 mouths, sixty eyeballs and sixty hands in the air. "Now wave 'em like you just don't c...." oh sorry I got carried away.


Some folks are patient, some folks are not. I will address the ones that are not. These guys are the ones who sit down and immediately start looking for the person that is their server. Where are they? Is that her over there? Yep..no... she went in the back. I am ready to eat she needs to get over here! 30 seconds go by... they are turning around in their seat, completely. They make eye contact, they look down at their watch, y'know for the tell all sign I am in hurry!!! You rush over after tending to the other 28 folks who just happen to be impatient as well. "Can we start off with an appetizer?" Server gets a look of astonishment on her face. "Well, sure but if you folks are in a hurry I can go ahead and take your order too." "We would like to start off with drinks and an appetizer" Ok! So the academy award performance was just because you wanted to be noticed?! You just want to be treated like you were the only table in the entire restaurant?! Here's the deal chief, You Ain't!

To all of the ones with the patience of a saint, God Bless You! You are the ones that it is a pleasure to serve. We will go out of our way to make sure you have everything you need and then some.
After I get you all fed, nourished and hydrated you would think you would be ready to go. This is not always the case. We have what servers like to call people who wont leave, "campers".

You sit in our section the entire dinner period. That means that I miss another table sitting there before the rush is over. That also means I miss that other tip too. I am not at the restaurant because I want to make sure you people get your vitamins! It is my job! The federal government has mandated that I make 4 dollars an hour. They are under the impression that I make enough tips in an hour to make this whole thing worth while. If you camp out in my section, I can't! Not everyday do we get "campers", but when we do it is frustrating. If you are unnecessarily sitting and there is a line at the door. You are just pathetically selfish, and need to be beat up. If you are going to sit at a table, in a section longer than it takes to eat. You should be prepared to double tip if you sit in the section the entire evening be prepared to triple tip. You need to pay rent for that table or booth. Whichever the case may be. You are conducting some form of business other than eating, colleagues discussing business, lover's quarrel, job interview, selling Mary Kay, secret affair, buttering up a sports recruiter,....yes, we have seen it all. You need to pay. Bottom line. Time is money. Respect your wait staff's time. Respect the section!